Good Like a Medicine

Oh, how sweet our 2 year-old Steven is! He keeps us on our toes, and he certainly keeps us entertained. I hope you’re ready to laugh. This one’s pretty funny.

The other day Eric and I were down in the kitchen with the kids, and he was trying to explain some mp3 conversion solution to me for a problem I was having. We were hovered over my laptop, which was plugged into the wall and set on the desk in our kitchen. To our rear were three happy kids at the kitchen table. All this was fine and nothing out of the ordinary. Steven and Lydia were playing with play-doh, and Steven kept pushing his finger into a pear located in the bowl on the center of the table. Eric finally said, “Steven, just eat the pear if you’re going to keep pushing your finger into it. Nobody wants to eat a pear with finger marks all pressed into the skin.” We turned back around and were occupied with iTunes for maybe 2 minutes tops, and the kids were playing so well and just humming to themselves. I glanced behind my shoulder after that and noticed some drippy, sugary juice on the table and thought, “Hmmmm. Weird. I thought he was going to eat the pear.”

Eric asked, “Steven, what did you do with the pear?”

“I ate it,” Steven replied.

Eric, looking confused (I think it’s so funny when he gets like this), “No, Steven, there’s no way you ate that. Mommy and Daddy just said you could eat it about 2 minutes ago. Where’s the pear?”

“Daddy! I ate it,” Steven said matter-of-factly.

It hit me - hard - and I began to burst out laughing. Eric was still confused, and I just kept giggling until it grew into a roar. I knew exactly what he had done. I looked to Eric. Eric looked to me. It was one of those hilarious husband-wife moments. “Honey, he ATE the pear. All of it. I’m sure. Look under the table,” I said, knowing that everything Steven leaves behind is inevitably under the table. Eric kind of rolled his eyes like, “You’re silly, Kristi,” and he bent over looking for the pear.

There it was: the lonely stem, the only remains of the green fruit our little man had stuffed into his mouth and devoured in less than a few minutes. But that wasn’t all. In his madness he was actually careful enough to peel off the sticker!

You just have to know Steven, and perhaps you had to be there for it to strike you as amusing as it did to us… but at least I grabbed the camera and captured the look on his face. After I took the shot he asked, “Mommy, can I go play now?” wiping his juicy mouth with his sleeve.

Moral of the story: Feed your children.
Moral of the story for new mothers: Feed your children, and keep your camera at arm’s length at all times. You will regret it if you don’t.