Good Like a Medicine

It is the small that God counts as significant.Small tasks - done with contentment and gratitude.Small prayers - spoken with a heart of trust and belief.Small deeds - offered as someone’s benefit with no hidden agenda or motive.I think my blog is unfortunately about “me” so many times, and that is because often I do not take the opportunity to mention what wonderful things I am learning from God’s hand through my children. That is a pity, but everyone knows how busy life can be. Here are some of the things I am learning from them:

• Steven is teaching me that it is pure joy and completely normal to stop whatever one is doing and bow in prayer. He does it all the time. I will turn around, and there he is on the floor. He will get down on his knees and whisper the sweetest words preceded by, “Dear God…” And it warms my heart. Today he prayed, “Dear Godpleaseletmyfootgetbetter…” (he runs all of his words together). I was perplexed and looked down under his foot, and lo and behold there were 3 misquito bites on the bottom of it. You can’t say a two year-old doesn’t know about supplication!

 

• Meredith is teaching me more as an infant than the other two did. Well, I’m sure that’s not completely true, but I think I just notice things more with her than I did with her siblings. She is so alert! Her big, blue eyes race around the room and accompany her open-mouth grin as she does her famous “inhaling” laugh and claps her hands. She is keenly sensitive to our voices and facial expressions, and I am reminded of how much I want to teach her the happiness of a loving family.

 

• Lydia is asking more questions than ever, which should be expected I guess from a three year-old. I pray almost hourly, “O Lord, please let us be close always.” I want to be able to answer her questions, or at least say, “I don’t know right now, but we can talk about it later and find the answer together.” She is starting to draw letters and pictures on her own, and I am having some of those “parenting” moments that follow the realization that no,my child doesn’t need me for everything. Wow. Her prayers are so funny, too. This morning she prayed in a loud whisper, ” OH, AND GOD, PLEASE DON’T LET OUR NURSERY AT CHURCH BURN DOWN.” I have no idea, really.

 

We are extremely busy with all kinds of duties and activities as I’m sure most families are, but God by his grace has given me renewed energy and desire to do the small things that matter to no one else other than my kids and husband. When I have dinner on the table and a fun activity planned, the children seem to smile more and carry themselves with an attitude of expectation, and I love that. And when I fall short and things get crazy as Daddy comes in from work, the least I can do is offer a smile and refrain from the grumbling that can extinguish the joy of our home.I shared this earlier with a blogging friend: God has used what I mentally call “spanking prayers” to teach me so much and give me hope as I pray for our family. Disciplining children is never fun. I hate having to stop whatever we are doing and spank and/or make one of the kids stand along a wall or the chair, or wherever we are. But God has used those times in the last several months to make me more prayerful and God-centered than I was. Lydia and Steven know that when I tell them to “go to the wall,” they are going to be there for a while. Not just a few minutes, but long enough to ensure that they have really considered whether or not they want to disobey again and be this bored. They know that there is little to no talking, even from Mommy, during this time. It can be quite awhile (and even a spanking or two) if there is a lot of anger or defiance floating around in the room. They know that Mommy is going to sit right there the whole time, and for that reason I used to inwardly moan at how I was being “punished,” too. But one day I felt the urge to just use that time sitting there in prayer. I will sometimes bow behind my child, sometimes touching a back or shoulder, sometimes kneeling and crying, as I ask God to draw our hearts to His heart. Sometimes I see God shedding some new light on the circumstance, and the Holy Spirit begins prompting me towards a repentant spirit and my plan for apologizing for some sin of neglect, irritation, impatience, or pride towards my child. Although it can really slow down our day to stop everything for 10,20,45+ minutes, God is teaching me that these “small things” are huge and worth it. These have been the sweetest times for me to focus on my child and be broken before God, recognizing that God owns our hearts and produces all goodness within by the power of His Son alone.These are some small things I am learning, but I think they are quite large in the scheme of things. (Oh, and ps - thanks for all of your logo comments. I’m still pondering the decision. I decided I didn’t like the black image on white background because it made the angel look like a witch to me. The good thing about the first one - the white logo on black background - is that I can change the background color to fit any application, and it will still look nice. I am going to step away from it for several days, and come back to see how I feel.)

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